I went to a bookstore tonight and found myself.

For some, the process of finding themselves can be a long, involved process riddled with failed love affairs, too many overnight stays in hostels or on friends’ floors, and possibly a visit to rehab… or at least some drug use.  My path to self-discovery was long and involved as well, but instead of hostels and drugs being the catalyst, there was a mobile home and a few children.

So, tonight I went with Hubby to the local evil chain bookstore and while he looked for some literature to purchase with his birthday giftcard I grabbed some crafting books to look through as Boychild played with the train in the children’s section.  I flipped through the pages of a wonderful book (that is now on my Amazon wish list) and was inspired enough to sketch some ideas and jot down notes on an envelope I dug out of my purse. 

Why do I think this was so cool?  Because, as I was sketching and writing and being inspired I felt like I was an artist.  I was able to own my desire to create the things I was drawing on that envelope and it wasn’t just “something I want to do”, it was something I know I can do and will do.  I am able, now, to call myself an artist and a writer and own those titles and not feel like I’m just wishing or dreaming. 

So, as I walked back through the store on the way out, this realization came to me and it was a small, quiet, earthshaking moment for me.  I suppose it was worth waiting for.

7 comments

  1. YES – worth waiting for. You are an artist and a writer. I could have told you that!

  2. Oh… the first of many oncoming unstoppable locomotives of quiet earth-shattering moments and realizations. Keep a notebook on hand 24/7 from now on, doll.

  3. I’ve had a similar experience but mine took 3 months… Why didn’t you tell me about this sooner? ;)

  4. I bought the book on Amazon! It arrived today… I’m going to read now. :D

  5. oh you’re mean Foxgloves!!!

  6. Yeah but that’s part of my charm, right?

  7. a very small part, fortunately.

Comments are closed.